“All you can take with you is that which you’ve given away.” This is the guiding principle for Bailey Bros. Building & Loan’s founder, Peter “Pa” Bailey, in the movie classic It’s a Wonderful Life.
The antithesis of corporate greed, Bailey Bros. sought to demonstrate that good business needn’t come at the expense of high moral values, of customer service, of helping make affordable home ownership attainable to many.
But I’m not here to debate what “high moral values” means. This Hollywood quote really came to mind when discussing the process on several different occasions this week, of downsizing and de-cluttering. Because it points out that we can’t take our possessions with us. As my friend Pat likes to say, “there’s no luggage rack on a hearse.”
And I’m certainly not going to insist that you must get rid of anything. While the idea of less stuff appeals to me, I know that’s a judgment call. You do you. What I am suggesting is that you use and enjoy what you have – whether that’s your everyday dishes, or the holiday ware that sits in your cabinets for 11 months of the year. Or it may be all your knickknacks, tchotchkes and shelf sitters. Then again, maybe it’s the classic business suit or your original denim jacket from your youth. If it’s in your possession, find a way to use it, as décor, as clothing, as utilitarian items. If you don’t find a way, perhaps it’s time to consider giving it to someone who wants or needs it more than you. If you find that difficult, keeping a photo of it might help.
Let’s go back to that quote for a moment, shall we? “All you can take with you is that which you’ve given away.” As I said, it came to mind when the topic of decluttering came up. But there’s a much more important message here. The bigger picture speaks to doing good in the world, creating the legacy of kindness.
Being kind is not difficult, and most of us want to show kindness. Now, remembering to be kind, that’s a challenge. We all have so much going on in our lives, it’s easy to forget that our words and actions matter.
We humans are a social species. We feel best, at our happiest, when we belong. We’ve all felt the sting of unkind words, words that cast us as outsiders. We’ve felt left out of group activities. We’ve felt like we don’t belong. On the flip side, think about how you respond to kind words and actions, being a part of, instead of apart from.
I don’t know about you, but I feel good when I help others feel good, when I share a part of myself. That might be helping a visitor learn about the aquarium animals, or suggesting my favorite restaurant when someone asks, or recommending a particularly good and uplifting book. It doesn’t have to be anything big.
In fact don’t go overboard. That’s a surefire way to burnout. Use resources you have plenty of, whether that’s time, money or energy.
If you have time, I highly suggest volunteering. There are plenty of groups out there that are looking for your talent. Choose one that speaks to you. Not only will you be helping others, you will be reminded of your own gifts.
If you have financial resources and not much time, do your research and pick an organization that is of particular interest to you. Be sure to check them out on Charity Navigator who ensures they are reputable and responsible with your money.
If you have boundless energy, the possibilities are endless. Help a neighbor, read to school kids, teach English to refugees, plant trees.
The point here is this: Your perpetual legacy is not measured by how much money you had, it is measured by your kindness, your love for all beings, the treasures that you bring to the world. Live kindly.
Carolynne
Love this!