Perfection is so overrated, don’t you think? I like to say I’m “perfectly imperfect” meaning I accept myself just as I am, with all my flaws and imperfections. Imperfections are what make us more interesting, special and unique. All those scars, both physical and emotional, tell a story about who we are today. Learning to accept your imperfections, instead of fighting them, is a healthy part of your wellness journey.
Loving yourself, including your imperfections, doesn’t mean that you don’t have self-improvement goals. You can always strive to strengthen your good qualities and develop skills and characteristics that you desire while loving the person you are.
Try these techniques to learn to love the imperfections that help make you who you are:
- First, accept the imperfections. The key to having a fulfilling and happy life is accepting yourself. Once you acknowledge that your imperfections are a unique part of you, you can move on to loving yourself. Remind yourself that everyone makes mistakes, has scars, or feels inadequate at some point in their lives. Avoid dwelling on these facets of your life. Make up for them as best as you can and move on.
- Let go of the comparisons. This can be a tough one for a lot of people, myself including, but if you spend time comparing yourself to others, it’s time to stop. Your journey is unique. You’re not on the same path as others. You may grow and change quite differently, and that’s a good thing! Instead of comparing yourself to someone else, focus on yourself. Notice how you’ve grown, celebrate your accomplishments, and look forward to a bright future with your own goals.
- Remember you’re not broken. Years ago, I remember saying to someone in my life, “I’m not broken, quite trying to fix me.” Challenges are a part of everyone’s life, so there isn’t something inherently wrong with you because you have obstacles.
- Pay attention to what you say to yourself. There is a direct link between self-talk and your health and mental wellness. What you say and your actions matter. Notice if you use negative self-talk that is humiliating or demoralizing. Does your inner dialogue make you feel inferior, ashamed, or guilty? You don’t want your words to create more pain and suffering! Learn to forgive yourself and be gentler.
- Remember that your days will vary. You may have days that make you feel amazing and on top of the world. You will also have days that make you feel defeated, sad, and tired. This rollercoaster of life is normal. The key is to avoid letting the difficult days affect you long-term. Turn your focus to positive self-talk, solutions, and taking action.
- Eliminate the toxic people. Toxic people can make it harder for you to accept and love your imperfections. Reduce your contact with those who consistently make you feel bad about yourself. An occasional critique from a loved one or friend is normal. However, constant criticism tends to wear you down. Evaluate your relationships and focus on the ones that are healthier for you.
Celebrate your imperfections! They make you the unique person you are. Learn to love yourself inside and out, and as a result, you’ll boost your self-confidence and gain greater peace as you pursue a life you’ll love.